Saturday, October 27, 2007
Gilbert Family Halloween Festival

Ok so my human and I don't technically qualify as a family. Ok so we don't actually live in Gilbert. Ok so the event was mostly geared towards families with small children. So what I say. We went anyway and my humans' friend Kathy went along too.

I was once again forced to wear my Halloween costume. Though I must admit I'm getting used it to now. Thankfully she didn't make me wear the goggles over my eyes; instead they were on my head. The place was well lit but it was still dark out and I doubt I would have seen a wall until I walked in to it with those goggles on.

Once we arrived I was in sensory overload. So many people, so many oddly dressed kids, lots of decked out canines and food! Food everywhere! Chicken, pork, beef, chips, fries, breads of every sort. Candies, cookies and doughnuts oh my! Did I get to actually eat any of it? No. Dag'nabbit. I had to sit and watch as the humans had chick-fil-a sandwiches and potatoes chips. The lady across from us at the picnic table had pizza and her friend had a hamburger.

This is where things are interesting. This lady across from us has a small child dressed as a fairy princess (a far too commonly used costume if you ask me). This kid would not and could not sit still A bit too much candy maybe? Oh yes.

The lady had commented on how well behaved I was and the humans talked a bit about who knows what. I was starting to drool a bit over the chicken sandwich that was mere inches from my nose. Oh the humanity.

After a few moments of watching mother struggle with wrestles daughter my human offered my services. I think she was trying to not only distract the kid but me as well. So the little one came over and started petting me. She smelled like food, it was all over her costume but nothing edible. I was disappointed.

Finally the ladies male friend came over and took the fidgety child away for some face painting and more candy. Like that was going to help her situation. When they returned the kid as a sticky sucker and was drooling all over herself. People tell me I drool a lot and after seeing this kid they have no reason to complain about my drool anymore.

After many attempts to de-sticky the wee one and a comment about needing a baby wipe or wet-nap my human once again offered my services. Gee it's a good thing I'm so talented. At first the lady just laughed when the offer to use my incredible tongue to clean the kids hands. But after a few moments and since the kid did want to pet me again she brought the kid over to me.

I gave a few sniffs and realized what a golden opportunity this was indeed so I wasted no time and got right to work. I licked every finger and between them with such a delicate touch the kid giggled a bit. Once one hand was sugar free I moved on to the other. I would have gladly cleaned her face and dress as well but that is when the humans put a stop to my efforts. I think the lady was pleased with my work and was just amazed at how gentile I was with her little princess.

We also met a nice man with a wiener dog dressed as a hot dog, of course. The poor little dog could hardly walk with the costume on.

The main reason for attending this event was to watch the Gilbert Police K9 officers in action. Oh baby baby, and they were fine looking studs to boot. We watched the demonstration and got a few pics. Immediately following that event was the second reason we went, the pet costume parade and free biscuits for me. It was short but fun and I got a treat so I was worth it. The costume parade was a bit unorganized but the organizers were only human after all.

Finally around 8:00 pm my human and her friend were starting to feel the chill of the night air. So we headed for the van and finally back home. It's always good to be home.

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Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Howl-O-Ween

Well tonight was the PetSmart Howl-O-Ween Party. It was a lot of fun and I looked fabulous. Annie looked pretty good too. This year my neighbor girl Cierra came along. The original plan was for Cierra to play all the doggie games with me so my human could take photos. Things never go according to plan.

Charlie, who was Annie's date for the evening, got put to work when one of the PetSmart employees didn't show up. So Cierra did some games with Annie, and some with me. Of course since my human was always holding on to one of us canines she couldn't take photos as easily as she would have liked.

My human joined in some of the games with me so I could strut my stuff along side Annie who was totally showing off. Now for some of the other well dressed pooches, view below. Oh and the fish was first place in the costume contest. I must admit, that was one darn cute costume.

Monday, October 22, 2007
Does It Fit?

The other night I was fitted for my Halloween costume. I'm not going to say much about the experience other than I can't believe my human enjoys putting me through such indignities. I can't decide if I look silly or stunning. The only bright spot is that even if I do look ridiculous, there will be another dog that looks even more pathetic than I do. I take great solace in that.

The dog Howl-O-Ween party is Tuesday (the 23^rd) and I have no doubt my human will take lots of pictures so I can share them with you after the party. For now all I can leave you with is: Howl-O-Ween 2007 coming soon..

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Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Puddle Jumping

Now that the seasons are changing it's starting to cool down a tad, especially towards dusk. For many months now the night time lows were in the 90s, now they are in the 70s. The cool down is very refreshing but there is one tiny, rather annoying, drawback.

You know those little yard sprinkler systems that pop up and spray water every which way. Well all too often they leak. They leak all day long and form little puddles in the sidewalk. These puddles are about six to eight feet apart from one another.

Normally I enjoy these puddles; a little water on my paws feels good when the pavement is 100 or more degrees. However now that it is getting cooler, so is the water. Heck these little puddles are down right frigid on my paws. Give me scorching hot pavement any day!

Now instead of trotting along side my humans' scooter gleefully prancing through the puddles I'm leaping over them. This makes trips to the grocery story (right up the street) a real problem. I spend a good portion of the run up and back leaping like a golden frog instead of strutting like the magnificent golden retriever you all know I am.

Gee I hope not many see me acting like such a wuss. I have a reputation to maintain.

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Monday, October 15, 2007
Medical Care (Joke)

This is a funny joke that came to my human via e-mail. It seemed appropriate enough for me to post on my blog.

Two patients limp into two different medical clinics with the same complaint. Both have trouble walking and appear to require a hip replacement.

The FIRST patient is examined within the hour, is x-rayed the same day and has a time booked for surgery the following week.

The SECOND sees his family doctor after waiting 3 weeks for an appointment, then waits 8 weeks to see a specialist, then gets an x-ray, which isn't reviewed for another week and finally has his surgery scheduled for a month from then. Why the different treatment for the two patients?

The FIRST is a Golden Retriever. The SECOND is a Senior Citizen.

Friday, October 12, 2007
It's not a chew toy or a snack?

One day my human and I went to petsmart. I figured we were there to get more goodies for me. Naturally, all goodies should befall me. This time however, she got a tank, a heater and all sorts of reptile supplies. I was beside myself with shock and awe. I didn't get a single thing.

A few days later this lady shows up with the strangest thing I have ever seen. It was tiny and smelled very strange. It had a hard outer shell and what appeared to be soft gooey innards. Maybe it was a new dog treat? Then it moved!! Oh my goodness my treat moved. I got a little closer for a better sniff and was quickly told to back up and leave it.

Maybe it was one of those battery powered dog toys. My excitement grew and after a few steps forward I was once again pushed back.

Finally my toy was placed inside the tank and given some water and green leafy stuff. Now I must admit that was odd even for human behavior. I spent several hours staring at this little creature as it wandered around the glass tank. It was unable to get out and I wasn't allowed to touch the tank.

After a little whining and being corrected for getting to close I finally came to the realization that this wasn't in fact a toy or treat. I wasn't going to get to play with it and it was going to stay inside the tank. So naturally I lost interest and wandered off to find my ball.

My human calls the creature Sputnik. Apparently it is a tortoise.

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Wednesday, October 09, 2007
I'm Pink

The other day, while pouring herself a glass of Gatorade my human spilled the substance all across the table. Naturally it quickly began to drip from the side and puddle on the tile floor. Since we all know I couldn't sit back and let my human clean the mess up all by herself; I jumped in to action and delicately licked up as much of the puddle as I could. Little did I realize at the time but the dripping from the table continued and doused my head. My human was hurriedly trying to clean the table top so she didn't notice either.

As hard as I tried I couldn't lick the top of my head. Oh but if I could, how sweet that would be.

When she finally noticed my wet head she giggled a bit. Muttered something about "silly dog" then got a dampened wash cloth and started to scrub my head.

Now the Gatorade washed out of her dish cloth readily. It washed out of her clothing easily, but did it wash off of my head? No. No it did not. In fact after three good scrubbings my pink spots were still there. I guess I'll be pink until it fades or I get a proper bath.

Who would have thought, Gatorade would stain a dog.

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Sunday, October 07, 2007
Today is your Birthday!

I want to wish a Happy Birthday to my humans' father.

I know you may feel old and tired,
and that morning coffee no longer keeps you wired.
Alas your special day means winter will be upon you in a hurry,
the wind will freeze; the snow will fall in such a flurry.
If this winter is anything like winters of the past,
Do you really think your snow blower will last?
You will scrape the ice from your windshield; you will shovel till your fingers go numb,
Yet no matter the hardship, no matter the cost, you will simply refuse to succumb.
It is for these traits that you are greatly admired,
However wouldn't it just be easier to move to Arizona and live near the daughter you sired?

Wednesday, October 03, 2007
Insolence and Aggravation

The other day at Frys (It's a local grocery store) I was in the store practicing heeling and turns with my human. I was doing great, so well in fact that my human parked the scooter and got up to walk around with me. We zigged and zagged around isles, walked part people shopping carts and the delectable smell of the deli area.

Towards the end of our little session my human stopped by the pharmacy for some allergy medication. The poor gal is suffering something terrible this fall. She's all stuffed up at night and just can't breathe, let alone sleep.

On the way to the pharmacy some guy started calling to me. "Hey there puppy, hi puppy" in a nice almost baby talk tone. I turned to look at him briefly as we walked past. My human ignored him entirely. Then he boomed out, rather loudly; "Can I pet your dog?" To that my human simply said; "No I'm sorry she's working" without even breaking a stride.

Obviously he wasn't going to take no for an answer. As my human was talking to the pharmacy people and paying for her pills I kept hearing him talking and this squeaky toy noise. Squeaky toys are a weakness of mine. I admit that freely. So naturally I began to stare at him. As my human started to walk away from the counter I was transfixed and distracted by the alluring noise.

My human stopped and followed my gaze back to that bothersome man. He was laughing as my human continually tried to gather my attention to no avail. Finally she looked up at him in disgust and he shouted out from where we was standing nearly 50 feet away; "See I told you he wanted me to pet him." and continued to laugh. Her response was simply; "That or she wants to bite you". This wasn't one of her best comebacks but fighting with me was proving to be quite a strain on her tiny frame. Lets face it, when I'm not attached to the scooter, if I want to go somewhere there is no way she can physically stop me.

So the man continued to make the squeaky noise, I continued to watch him, my human dragged me down the isle to the parked scooter and the man watched and laughed the whole time. In all honesty my human should have called the police. Interfering with a service animal is a crime here in AZ and she could have pressed charges. However my human is a sweet and very gentle lady so we just went back to the scooter and want straight home.

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